Living With Dementia

My Grandma got Dementia in the late 90s. That's when she started sending me duplicate cards, for birthdays and other holidays.

Before that time she was really with it! She gardened, sewed, did cross-stitching, played games, swam at the Y and more.

When I had Mica and Isaak, she loved them so much! Her face would light up, when she saw them. She always called them "girls". Probably because she had girls of her own. Her oldest grandchildren were girls. Mica used to say, "She has bubbles in her hair!" Referring to her silver white curls.

There were two times that really scared me: 

1. When she ran away, while my Grandpa was in the shower. They had an alarm system that would go off if she tried to leave. It did. BUT he was in the buff, and she took one of his shoes.

An immigrate from Mexico found her hurt. He didn't speak any English, but helped her up, and called 911. She had a broken wrist. It was then, that they decided to put her in a home. Something My Grandpa and her promised each other would never happen.

Looking back - I wish I would have thought to do something. I envisioned putting a vinyl up of a book shelf on the door. Then she wouldn't think of it as a door. I was about to do it, but it was too late. They decided it was best to move her.

2. Towards the end she would get agitated being around a lot of people. Family gatherings were hard. It's best to have small gatherings, during the day time. When the sun goes down, they have more confusion. This is called, "Sundowning". She would gather all the paper plates to wash by hand. Then she'd try and leave out the garage door, which is where my Uncle had his Wood Shop. Not a great place, for Grandma to have been.

Why I'm bringing all this up: 

Mica was supposed to work with patients that have Multiple Sclerosis, Parkinson's, and Dementia this semester for his Healthcare Academy class.

The M.S. Forward group is amazing. They really try to be there for the students. They helped set up Goalball, play catch with the students (kind of a challenge when some of them can't see), plan cook outs and more.

People that have Parkinson's work with M.S. Forward.

Working with Dementia patients is a newish thing. It's been in the works all year. They just went on their first field trip to the home. After permission slips were signed, lunches were gotten, and the bus was called. Get this...the class gets there, and only 2 patients came out. The rest were too busy in the game room to come out. They were playing Solitaire and BINGO. I totally blame the Director of the home, not the patients, and not the teacher. It kind of makes me sad. I was so looking forward to Mica working with them. He started his life out with my Grandma, that probably seemed a bit crazy to him. When really she was a totally great person, who's brain was being attacked.

His teacher was so disappointed. She planned for it all year. The poor lady has had a difficult class anyhow. This not to happening field trip didn't help.

Health Care Academy

I know I've been hanging low for blogging lately. It's the end of the semester where I teach, Travis has been working long hours on his chair design that should be finished as of this morning, Isaak has homework he needs help with most nights, the boys have had a lot of evening events for school, and I've been looking for freelance design work. Travis has yet to mow the lawn. He won't let Mica or I do it because it's the first time it will be mowed. With my allergies it's not a great idea I mow anyhow.

Moving on...

Last weekend Mica had his first Health Care Academy Expo. 

I have to be honest...I didn't know what to expect with this academy. I do know a few years ago Mica wanted to be a Pediatrician. He's since changed his mind, after he had Astronomy class. I told him it's not as easy to have a career in Astronomy. He said, "I can be an Astrophysicist." I said, "That means you have to have a lot of math, which you don't care for. You can't live in Omaha, Nebraska for a career like that. That's ok you can move." He didn't say anything. I wanted him to try out the Health Care Academy because it's free. If he doesn't like it, he isn't paying for college classes to realize that. I convinced him to join up with the Health Care Academy at school. They have a one week camp during the summer, and lots of classes and activities during the school year. He was hesitant, but decided to apply because I asked him too. He had an interview, and had to fill out an application. Mica got in. If he hates it, it will be my fault. Ha!

Good Vibes:

The Health Care Academy is ran by his homeroom and science teacher he had last year. She was great for both. Good vibes going in!

What the Health Care Academy Expo was About:

They were slow to get started. Lots of speakers, pharmaceutical booths and food.

I found out that the King Science students will be working with patients that have Multiple Sclerosis, Parkinson's, and Dementia. I've known people that have had each of those.

One speaker has Multiple Sclerosis, another is a Neurosurgeon, there were Pharmaceutical Reps., and Mica's teacher.

Pharmaceutical Reps:

They weren't big Pharma! They are in support of therapies and research, for all these diseases. They had ice packs, neck wraps, pens, and other things to hand out.

Other Speakers:

We got to hear a lot about how the students at King Science helped with the patients this school year. Both the patients and the students that participated in the program this year were happy to have each other.

One thing that the patients need to do is laugh every day. That can be hard when you're depressed. 

They have to work on coordination. Another challenging thing. If your body is giving out, how do you control it? The students had to play ball with the patients. There's a lot of communication skills that have to happen to play catch with someone that may not be able to see, can't react as fast as someone that doesn't have a disease.

Inspired:

I was feeling inspired by all the speakers.

I was thinking...I hope Mica gets a lot out of this! I want him to be inspired, and feel more empathy than he currently does.

While I was thinking all this Mica leans towards me and whispers, "Mom I think I know what I want to do with my science fair project next year. I want to change graphite into a diamond. I've seen a video on how you can do that. That would be cool right?" Here I was thinking he was going to have something health care related to say, or how he's learning so much about MS, but nope. Maybe he'll be more empathetic and inspired next year.

Certificate:

They called up all the people that participated this school year, then the ones that will participate next school year.

It's odd that there are Spiehs' at most all of Mica's school events. I don't know them personally, but that's my maiden name. Not a lot of Spiehs' in the US. So a Spiehs was called up.

Mica got called up to. He does this thing where he dances in place, while he's up on stage. Maybe he's trying to be cool? It's too hard to get a photo of someone giggling all around. Ha!

Did you take any health care classes in school?

The Case of the Missing Banana Bread

Once upon a time my Grandmother passed away of Dementia. Shhh...don't tell, but she was my favorite Grandparent. I know it's not right to have favorites, but she played games with me, took me to the movies, cooked for me, had small sugar cookies waiting for me, and taught me a lot of things.

Isaak with Grandma. I think she died a few years after this photo was taken. Rest in peace!

Fast forward: 

Me, "Get out the banana bread I made this weekend."

Travis, "You didn't make any banana bread."

Mica, "Ya you didn't. I haven't had that, since Christmas time."

Isaak, "Yes she did. We had it this weekend! What's wrong with you guys?"

Me, "It's here somewhere! I had a kid put it away. I made it before I made the dessert pizza for the family get together. Remember I got everyone another piece and we watched Under the Dome, while we ate it? Mica do you remember I showed you how the bread was done by putting a toothpick in the center?"

Mica sat there with a puzzled look on his face.

Isaak, "Mom I remember. I don't know what's wrong with these people!"

Me, "Here's the recipe card. Still out! It's evidence."

Travis, "Drop it. It's no where to be found. You didn't make the bread!"

Our freezer is packed from berry picking, but I found it!

Travis said, "Well your Grandma died of Alzheimer's. I'm thinking it's going to happen to you."

I think he's the one that's going to get Alzheimer's.

The Things They Say

I always love the things that come out of little kid's mouths. My kids are getting older, so hearing funny things is becoming less and less of a thing.

We had 2 funny things said this week.

Isaak:

We have a {Who Can Get Dressed First} contest in the morning. Isaak was tallying up 1st, 2nd... He came in the kitchen and said, "Dad got gold, Mom got bronze, I got silver, and Mica got dementia." It took me a second to think, "Oh you mean honorable mention." He said, "Ya that."

Mica:

We were playing Clue, and he kept referring to Colonel Mustard as, "Colonial Mustard". He did it the whole game. He said, "Mr. Body was killed by Colonial Mustard with a lead pipe in the ballroom." So on and so forth.

Alzheimer's Request

I've been thinking about my Grandma lately. Her birthday was around Thanksgiving. She passed awhile ago from Dementia.

It was hard seeing her go from a lady that could do it all (in my mind) to someone that could do very little.

She got to the point where Mica was on the same level as she was. Then it was Isaak. Then it was no one at all.

When she was in a home Mica didn't want to see her. He said, "Mom please don't take me to that place where no one can talk."

When she passed Isaak had a lot of questions. 

You can see Isaak playing with his Great Grandma here. That toy scared her. Shortly after I took this picture, I had to take the toy away.

Here's a post on the Alzheimer's Awareness facebook page:
I thought it was a really good message. 

Alzheimer's Request
 
Do not ask me to remember,
don't try to make me understand.
Let me rest, and know you're with me,
kiss my cheek and hold my hand.

I'm confused beyond your concept.
I'm sad, and sick, and lost.
All I know is that I need you,
to be with me at all cost.

Do not lose your patients with me,
do not scold or curse or cry.
I can't help the way I am acting.
I can't be different though I try.

Just remember that I need you,
that the best of me is gone.
Please don't fall to stand behind me,
love me til' my life is gone.