Saturday, May 8, 2021

Random Tid Bits

 1. Isaak’s been a swear word police. He keeps saying, “Language!” When I saw this t-toilet, I so wanted to get it. 

2. The kid’s school district sent an email saying they want all remote kids in class the last few weeks. Mica went back on Friday. 

One girl hasn’t seen Mica for a year. She said, “Mica what happened to your voice?” Yep he now sounds like his Dad. 

3. Isaak says he never wants an Adam’s apple, nor does he want his voice to drop like Mica’s did. Growing up is hard to do! 

4. I’m almost done with my Midland class. It was so easy. I’m not the biggest fan of Canvas though. It’s not super picture friendly. Considering it’s a visual class, it was a pain to not get pictures into the tests. It kept erroring out. 

Were you really judgy about anything when you were a teen? I remember being annoyed that my parents only listened to John Denver and Neil Diamond. 

5. Mica’s decided to be super judgmental when it comes to TV and movies.  

Sunday, May 2, 2021

Together and Apart

Has anyone become a recluse with this pandemic? 

The idea of going out of the house makes me shutter. I’ve even been vaccinated. I can still be a carrier to my kids, that haven’t been vaccinated. Isaak going to school is much more of a risk than me going out, with a mask on, and a good hand washing when I get home. 

My husband has been on me about leaving more. I even went to work to donate some envelopes, and set up parking - it seemed like a big step to leave the house to do that. 

Last weekend we went hiking. A simple thing, low contraction rate, but it seemed like such a big task in my mind. Travis was all about getting me to leave the house. When we hiked he was also all about leaving the trail. Being at one with nature is ok, but I don’t need to break an ankle in doing so. I don’t know when I got to be such a wimp. I just am not a fan of heights. Apparently I’m now a recluse. 

Has this pandemic turned you into a home body? 

Friday, April 30, 2021

Random Tid Bits

I know I've been horrible about posting. I've been pretty much diving into work. I don't even know why. Maybe it's because I was a teacher handing over my ideas, and now I can put those ideas to use by creating them. Oh I wish that was it! It kind of is. Ok, so it's complicated. 

1. My work loves a look. It's kind of fun, but it's just shapes, and more shapes. No concepts, or bringing their idea of storytelling into their work. I opened up the file that was given to me, to was all kinds of a mess. Shapes that didn't line up with other shapes. It was annoying because it was paid for work. Meaning they reached outside the office to pay for it. Rule number one when working in Illustrator: Use the Align tool! 

Back up! Anyhow I was so excited to design this ebook from the day I got the project. Like really excited! Ok beyond excited. I've taught how to create brand guides for years! I've only created a full book like this with SOFT. 

That excitement ended with to disappointment when I learned that the project wasn't just mine. A firm was going to do it. The one that aligned the shapes not so well. I got really excited again when I was told by the marketing head (who is now a contractor) to finish it. She meant only the writing. I got really excited again when my boss told me that they were going to try using me for it. She meant to use the outside firms look. I kept getting burnt. Really I just wanted to do it. So I decided to take my own advice I gave my students a long time ago...when they were more excited about a sketch that I didn't care for...I said to do the one I wanted + prove me wrong with the one they wanted to do. So...I did that. 

I thought for sure they'd pick mine. I put time into it. It was good. I got it critiqued by a designer that lives in Chicago. I made all the changes, but a few. I was planning on taking some type out because I know it's too much to read. I just haven't yet. Never did I think they'd pick the one I did in 2 hours, that had subpar photos, and no alignment. 

I had my meeting, and you probably guessed it, they didn't even talk about the one I cared about. I made sure it had their colors, their fonts, and some of their shapes within it. 

The moral of the story is...maybe Alissa (me) cares too much. Maybe I have a vision that's as strong as their mission. Maybe I suck, and just don't know it. But I do know that it's good. I showed people that love it. By now I know what good work is. I can't deny that, that gave me Imposter Syndrome AKA self doubt. I flat out cried. Why? Why in the heck did I care so much? It's not the change of life. It's more than that. 

By the way I'm not in this to bash my work. It's more about how I feel. I don't think they get it, get me. They are techy people, not creative people. I don't expect them to get it. I'm not mad, I'm hurt. It's a struggle because I actually like them. It's hard to be mad, when I like the people I want to be mad at.

Ok so it would have been nice, to at least mention, "Hey Alissa I like what you did there, but we can't use it because of x, y, and z." I'm tired of crickets. Tell me something. Then I know you're human. Tell me you hate my work. At least I know you're human. 

Just on Scribd it's messing up the quotes. I don't plan on presenting it this way, but dang that's annoying! It's not like that in InDesign, or as just a PDF. Odd!

Youth Book by alissa apel on Scribd

The crazy thing is, is these people are open minded with politics, religion, gays and more. They can't see me. They can't see how important this project was for me.

I felt odd crying. Like I wasn't supposed to be crying. Why do adults tell kids that it's ok to be sad, but when we're sad we feel like a sap, or like we're feeling emotions all wrong? 

I'm sad because I'm f-ing HUMAN! 

I found this article about how you can get your boss to support your personal brand. It hits home with how I feel, but I'd never be able to share this with my boss or bosses. I did share it on LinkedIn. That's probably as far as it will go. 

A few quotes that stood out:

"Q: Why would I want to invest in an employee’s brand instead of the company brand? 
A: Because they are one and the same." 

 "Want to attract the best talent? Invest in the personal brands of the talent you have. This is just one benefit of investing in your employees’ personal brands. Another is: Humanizing your company, which leads to better sales since people prefer to buy from people they know, like, and trust, rather than faceless corporations." 

"Investing in an employee's personal brand increases retention. Q: Won’t investing in the employee’s personal brand make her more attractive to outside offers? A: Yes, but it will also make her more likely to turn them down."

Anyhow I totally connected with that article. 

2. At least when I did a quick flyer for a youth program the next day, they loved it. The Imposter Syndrome feeling sort of went away. 

3. Isaak's made a strong friendship through that bully incident. Good came from bad. He's coming over for his birthday. We haven't had anyone over, since May - except for my parents, that's only because they invited themselves over. 

4. Isaak is a bit more peppy these days. He wants to try out for the morning announcements. He was excited a teacher nominated him for a club that gets a trip at the end of next year. Only 15 people were nominated out of his class. 

5. Mica's Mica. He's just so smart with his studies. But dang the kid is dingy at tasks. Can't win them all.

Tuesday, April 27, 2021

WW: Door {Linky}

I really like very old things, about as much as I like very new things.

I've only been to work in person 2 times. Once was to get my laptop, and the other time was because we were notified that our power was going to be shut off for the morning due to maintenance. This door was right by where I parked.

Would you say yay or nay to restoration? What do you like better, old or new?

What Causes Eating Disorders?

Eating disorders are very serious conditions that can lead to other health problems and, sadly, sometimes death. For someone who doesn’t have these kinds of issues, it can be very hard to understand why someone might struggle to eat or appear to have an insatiable appetite, and this can lead to making snap judgements that could be detrimental to the person who is dealing with an eating disorder. This is why it’s important to think about what causes these conditions in a bit more detail, and below are a few reasons why it might happen to you or a loved one. 

There was a time where I saved someone's life. The girl was in school, went home for a semester, and came back. I was a resident assistant at the time. I noticed she withdrew from everyone. When she ate there was only a few carrots on her plate. I had dreams about her passing away. Her fingers seemed so long, and she lost a ton of weight all over. I turned her story in to her resident assistant, the director, and finally the school phycologist. The school phycologist was the only one that helped. She thanked me, because if she went on much longer she would have been dead. I have no if she got through treatment. I hope she did!

Environmental Factors

A very common cause of eating disorders is outside pressure from society. For decades, unrealistic expectations of beauty or what is considered to be healthy has been promoted through various forms of media. Models in fashion magazines and movie stars have spent hours sitting in makeup artists chairs and having their hair styled to appear flawless. Their images are almost always edited to remove any perceived blemish, creating an image of beauty that in reality does not exist. This has only been made worse with people editing their photos and posting them on social media, perhaps even slightly embellishing their efforts to live a healthy lifestyle, too. All of these pressures can make a person feel inadequate, and this is what can result in an eating disorder.

They might not only feel this way because of the images they see in the media, either. It could also be someone commenting on their weight, telling them that they are too fat or too skinny. If this is something that is happening fairly regularly, eventually that person might start to believe it, even if it isn’t true.

Mental Health

Dealing with depression and low self-esteem can also play a part in someone developing an eating disorder, and these negative mindsets can be incredibly dominant and lead to worries over body image. Post-traumatic stress is another mental health issue that is commonly connected with eating disorders. It might be used as a form of control for an individual who feels like they have lost it in the other aspects of their life, and this might make them feel more empowered. It’s very important to explore a patient’s mental health if they have an eating disorder, and through eating disorder therapy, counsellors can help patients get to the root cause of the problem for more effective treatment and hopefully lasting rehabilitation.

Family History

It is rare, but in some cases, a patient with an eating disorder might also be able to identify other family members who have struggled or are struggling with the same problem. There isn’t a lot of data to reflect genetic eating disorders, and this might be because a lot of people don’t come forward if they do have one because of the stigma that is attached to it. However, this might have a part to play in some cases of eating disorders and is something that should be considered.

If you are concerned that a loved one is suffering from an eating disorder, try to do some research into this further to better understand the causes and the symptoms so you can provide them with better support. If you think you have an eating disorder, speak to your doctor to ask for help and treatment options.

Tuesday, April 20, 2021

WW: Joy

Last week was a rough week! 

My almost 13 year old was picked on at school. He was called the "N" word over and over again, and shoved around during a no touch football game. I was sad he was sad. When human's are picked on it's not just because of their skin. Sometimes it's for different reasons. I have a long list of artist friends and many of them have gotten picked on because they think differently. Don't they know that artists paint their bland world? It's also not "popular" to be nice. Isaak's both an artist and is nice.

My coworker told me to contact the Division Officer at the school about it. I sent an email, and got back an email from the Division Officer that same day, had not one, but two phone calls from the Principal and Vice Principal at the school to call and talk to me personally about the incident. They are opening up dialog about the issue to all the students, and the boys that caused him to cry are getting in trouble. I don't even want to know how. The boy that stood by Isaak the whole time is now Isaak's bestie. They talked on the phone for an hour last night. Isaak may of been pushed down, but he's being built up. He even put together a desk, for the most part all by himself. 

Then Mica is fully remote, and got this postcard in the mail. Things are starting to turn around. 

Sunday, April 18, 2021

They Go Low, You Go High

Isaak was big time bullied last week. To the point where I wanted to stomp right into his school and scream. Of course I didn't. But I wanted to. 

Two bullies kept calling him the “N” word in PE. Not a word we use ever. Anyhow after them repeating it all throughout gym class, he broke down crying, and took himself on over to the councilors office. I’ve been crying just thinking about it. He didn’t want to tell because he thought that would make things worse for him. I told him that if people asked why he was crying they are the good people. But if he didn’t want to talk about it, he could just tell them he got hurt. They don’t need to know it was his feelings that got hurt. He’s a freaking great kid, empathetic, and pretty good looking. Nice people get picked on. What the heck is wrong with people?! I told him to talk to his teachers, tell them what happened, and to watch for this repeat behavior. I’ll be emailing them as well. The “N” word should just never be used. I wasn’t going to say anything, but that just makes situation like this worse. We need to talk about shit shows. Bullies shouldn’t and can’t win.

Here’s something you don’t usually hear...artist types are often made fun of because we’re odd, different, look at the world differently. It’s not always a skin color, male vs female thing. Guess what? I’d rather be odd, and think outside the flipping box that non artist types make. 

I even grew up hearing my mom's side of the family say to me, "Oh you're just like your father!" Kind of in a snarky way. I know they love me. They appreciated him too. In a, You do so much for me kind of a way. When they needed landscaping help, he was there, he helped with my cousin's Boy Scout Troop, and way more. I may have been young, but I remember all that kind of stuff. I just don't remember my math facts, and academic stuff.

So I hung out with Isaak while he built a desk. He’s did an amazing job. When people are pushed down, they can rise up by building something.

Monday, April 12, 2021

It's a New Dawn, It's a New Day

I keep getting this song in my head. 

Except I don't know that I always feel good. I just feel like having kids old enough to want to hang out in their rooms more than with me, and so many new jobs have me feeling like life has started over.

What's a song that's been in your head lately? 

Thursday, April 8, 2021

What Would You Do?

I was sitting in my living room, and all the sudden we heard a ton of yelling. 

Naturally we all looked outside. There was a man trying to chase a woman, and the woman walking very fast trying to get away from one the guy. 

She was wearing a pink nightgown or bath robe. It was odd. 

I picked up my phone, and did something I've never done by calling 911. 

They asked if it was a fire, or an emergency... I explained that it was neither. I went into what was happening. Then told them that I just didn't want this fight to escalate more than it already had. She agreed, and sent a dispatcher out. 

Travis looked pissed at me. He said, "You should have asked me before you called. no There isn't a real emergency going on." I mentioned that I'd let the cops decide that. Then all three boys in my house were annoyed with me. They thought I was over reacting. 

Here's the thing I've never called 911 in my life. I felt like I was on that show, "What Would You Do". It  was a test.

Did I over react by calling 911, or did they over react because I called 911?

To me it wasn't about if I was wrong or right. It was about preventing something worse from happening.

Tuesday, April 6, 2021

WW: Dinner {Linky}

Isaak is 12, and had this strong desire to make steak. I bought some, and he made a good steak. Why can't I get our 15 year old to volunteer to make dinner?


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