Thursday, February 11, 2010

Rasing a Well-Mannered Child

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  • I have to admit...I felt like I was on the right track with my children, but lately Mica has been acting up. My sister and I were just talking about this...we don't know if our preschoolers are going through a phase, or have cabin fever from this horrible winter. Both of our preschooler's have been really whinny when they don't get their way lately! I've had to talk to Mica on the phone when I was at work, and he seemed to straighten up. Then last night I took him out of the restaurant we were at because he was whining when we didn't get him dessert. The last three times we've been out to eat he got dessert because he had coupons for two places, and Village Inn gives out a free piece of pie on one night of the week. Mica took that as, him getting dessert every time we go out. We were not about to buy dessert last night. I think sometimes for good behavior, you just can't give kids their way. They may whine, but in the end you are the parent, and they need to know that for the next time and the time after that. Mica got a balloon when it was time to go home last night. He's really into balloon's from the movie Up, but I wouldn't let him play with it until today since he was whining for dessert.
  • I started giving both of my boys time-outs at an early age. Some of my co-workers don't believe that time-outs work, but they have on Mica and for Isaak. Mica used to sit there and talk about what he did that was wrong. Isaak goes to the time-out chair when we warn him. He doesn't understand that we are just warning him.
  • I make both kids say, "Please" and "Thank you"! I think this is really important.
  • I also make my kids help to pick up. We do it together.
  • As Mica has gotten older (he's 4) he is given more responsibilities. He has to put his pants, shoes, clean socks/underwear, coat and preschool backpack away. Both boys put their dirty clothing in the hamper. Isaak helps me put clothing in the washer and dryer.
  • I try and have the kids help me in the kitchen when they can do something. Like Mica puts some groceries away in the refrigerator, Isaak gets boxes and cans out of bags and he hands them to me. Then they both dump ingredients in the mixer when I'm making bread or cookies.
  • They are not perfect boys, and they do go through stages of being naughty. I think this is normal for the average kid. I think the best thing to do is to not let them get away with it. Mica knows that he goes in the cart if he runs in the grocery store. We send them to bed if they are tired and acting out. Otherwise they get a time-out, or sent to the car if you are out and about until they can cool down. Then they know that their behavior isn't acceptable.
  • Of course show them that you love them too. I try and give each kid attention every night before bed by reading to them and giving them cuddle time. In the morning they get cuddle time too. I would hate for them to act up only because they are feeding off of negative attention. They need positive attention too!

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